IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, IT'S ME


H E L L O 



It has been so long since my last post isn't? Hahaha. Okay here the update of my life. Lol. I am successfully graduated an academic diploma. Jyeahh. Now I am no longer a UITM Arau student. 

Okay, here now I am a UITM Seremban student, a degree student. Yes. Living as an young adult is not easy you know. What a life drive me to a mundane world of adult. 

Okay, I want to tell you a story about something. Jeng jeng jeng. Okay, I am deeply in hurt right now. Like really hurt. How am I going to start? Hmmmm

It started like a few days ago. A friend of mine was going out. I suspected that she was going out with a 'guy'. I assume that. Then when she get back home, I asked her "Ha, kau keluar dating eh dengan dotdotdot?"
And she said "No way lah." Then give me a few more acceptable excuses that make me believe that she didn't go out with that dotdot guy. It just a simple question with simple answer right? 

But the next day, I saw a story of that 'dotdot guy' met (or in other word I rather use is 'date') with my friend. It hurt me super deeply. Not like I am jealous or whatever, but she lied to me. Like she strongly deny yesterday that she gone out with him. Like why she lied to me. I thought we already close that she will tell me about that small story. Like I said , I ask  a really simple question yesterday either she met that guy and she said no. WHY? 

I know some people might not really open to tell other about their private life. But I thought we already close to let me know about that simple detail. But you decide to lie to me. So that open my eyes that we are not that close. So from this exact moment, I decided to never ever open up my life to her anymore, and let both of us just be friend that just have casual conversation without me or her tell about each other private life.

I am a very hard person to get close with. Because you know I have that rest bitch face all the time. It is not easy for me to open up my life to one person, but I thought she might be the one that will care about me and will make me feel I am one of the important person in her life. But no. I am not. So here I am feel strongly isolated. 

I think at the end, it is my own fault to get the wrong idea at first that thought she could be that important person in my life, but you know she's not wrong in this situation. It is my fault. I am the one who have that mind at first. So hahahahhahahaha bye gais.